Today I Reflect

Have you ever been betrayed? Betrayed to the point it will cost you your life? Choices. Today, Maundy Thursday is observed by Christians everywhere…the Thursday before Easter. 🌷It also signifies the Last Supper of Jesus Christ with his apostles prior to his betrayal and ultimately his death. Can you imagine loving another so much that you’re willing to die for them including the one that betrayed you? Heavy, heavy choices. Today I pause to reflect on both the turmoil and burden Christ must’ve had in his heart. Life brings many choices… some, very difficult. You just pray you’re hearing correctly. Yesterday, I had to help make such a choice for my mother who could not make the choice for herself. Seeing her cry, being continually scared 💔(esp since her cardiologist stroked her) just put through SO MUCH since October and now yet another, major, choice followed by surgery. I sure hoped and prayed I was doing the right thing on her behalf. AND praying the doctors were right this time. My heart felt like it would burst. Only time will tell if we made the right one. So today, I lean hard on my Lord and reflect on choices and the heavy decisions that Christ would face as he walked this lone road. 💗 Life can be hard, not at all like we expected and yet we still have to believe this is the path God intended us to walk. Ultimately, he is in control and knows beginning to end. It’s our path to walk. Our story. Our testimony. Hard or not. May I make the right choices and may I be found worthy in the end. 🙌

My backyard

The Best Products I’ve Found the Last 10 Years with this Eczema Battle

First, let me say I have struggled over 50 years with eczema\atopic dermatitis and asthma. But in the last 10 years when my skin got really bad, I finally had to stop working. 😞 And I had to search high and low for products that would help me. This is not a sponsored post, but I am hoping to share so that you can get your eczema under some kind of control.

I also have a video on YouTube discussing the CeraVe products I feel have worked best for me in the last 10 years.

What I’ve Tried

Through the years, I have literally tried every single product, every diet, had my home and life literally revamped by eliminating all chemicals and fragrances, used “natural” things, worked off a national database for my chemical allergies and even finally resigned to an immune suppressing drug that I used for seven years as I was itching so badly, all day and night, that I was losing sleep and close to losing my ever loving mind! I have now been off that drug since 2016.

Since the 1960s, I’ve also had every kind of testing imaginable as well as allergy shots and strong meds as well as followed special diets.

Basically, I’ve had eczema, asthma, and allergies for the last 52 of my 56 years of life. And I’ve tried it all! But, every so many years I learn something new or find better help with this ongoing disease. I’ve spent countless hours of research and will continue to do it. I’ll never stop searching for help till we find a cure!

Why Did I Wait?

I finally decided to write a little about my health issues. But for so long, I felt it brought on anxiety/PTSD every time I tried to write…quite literally. I just couldn’t bring myself to write just thinking about all the horrendous years of suffering. (I did have a doctor tell me that this is a REAL thing…PTSD related to long time health suffering and disease.)

However, my intent was always to learn how to create a website in order to help others find relief with their ongoing battles. Initially, I wanted to start this blog to help others with similar health battles. (This is just one of the battles I face along with Lyme Disease, eye disease and Fibromyalgia.) I hope to write about them as well.

My Allergy Journey

I have suffered for so so long and have spent thousands, literally thousands, of dollars, as I’m sure many of you have. 😔 I also didn’t want to “waste my suffering” and LOVE helping others, so I have attempted to finally share some things on this site.

My Recent Battle

I had to quit teaching 10 years ago, so I feel this is just another way I can “teach” others in order to help them through this eczema/dermatitis hell. I also hate that SO many people suffer without finding any real solutions, and I’ve been looking for answers long before there was an internet, so I hope I can help you in some way! I know you are as desperate as I have been all these years and that’s why you are probably here now. Searching. Searching for anything, just as I have all these years!

*Warning*

I’m sharing some scary pictures here, but I’m trying to be real and vulnerable in hopes I can identify with you. Honestly, it’s hard for me to show these!

I continue to battle this disease; although my skin has done a lot better since educating myself about chemicals and fragrance in particular. It’s in everything! I feel my skin has gotten better, but I almost hate to say that because as you know, you can have flareups at any moment.

I struggled horribly for eight years as a kid then again right before I got married, in my 20s, and then since 2009 when I entered menopause. I truly believe there’s a hormonal link as well. 🤔

As part of my ongoing research, I found some products that helped me tremendously; especially in the last 10 years.

Here is the video discussing some of the help I’ve found through CeraVe products.

Link to video:

https://youtu.be/kdQrox1dVhg

I wasn’t able to get all my pics loaded in that video, so I added those today. These are just a few pics over the last 10 years, but as a child I was pretty miserable and made fun of a lot. (I had rashes that got infected in the bends of my arms, legs, neck, and ears as well. They were pretty gross looking.)

And as you know, this itch is like none other and never ever lets up. So you itch in your sleep (If you finally get any.) and you keep itching that raw, broken skin and that can in turn set up infection. Then you have to deal with raw, stinging skin that burns just from the air or bath water hitting it. I know it can be so very painful. So, I say all this to say I can identify. I sure can! It just breaks my heart to see the little babies suffering. I feel their pain and yours too, mama.

I pray you have wisdom. That you find strength to go on and also maybe find some help with this post today! 🙏 Hang in there! We are in a tremendous battle! 💪🏼 I’ve made it 56 years now and was diagnosed at four years old. It hasn’t been easy, but I’m still here. 💗🤗

I also know depression is very common for eczema suffers and research shows many feel suicidal. Please get help if you feel you are sinking! Sometimes our family and friends just can’t understand how horrible it feels and that constant itch can wear on your mind especially when you’re losing sleep for decades. I tell people mosquito bites, chiggers, poison ivy, chicken pox (all I’ve experienced too. ) doesn’t even come close to this kind of itch, does it?!!! So don’t be afraid to ask for help! I haven’t been very good at that either.

I always try to do things myself. Miss Independent 🤗…. I’m a pretty good faker and have used clown makeup to cover sores even when painful. So I know we fake it! But I want you to know that you’re not alone! I’ve read some pretty heart wrenching stories about those suffering with this disease and I want to encourage you! This disease is exhausting!

I also have included links to the CeraVe items I use and will share more products later.

Let me say, that it took me years and years to even understand how to bathe, hydrate, and moisturize effectively, by using the CeraVe products in a way they would most benefit and promote healing. You have to get ahead of it all. That’s key! I have had hundreds of doctors, from around the country, and through the decades, and none have ever really explained to me how to properly use the CeraVe products for their full benefit. Crazy right?! It’s just been trial and error and a lot of research on my part! So keep trying! Keep seeking out different doctors if need be. Research, research, research. Now you have the internet and YouTube…I didn’t have that as a young person and It has helped me so much in this long journey and the last ten years especially!

Another word about these CeraVe products. I am highly allergic and sensitive, so these products are the only “free and clear” type products that HAVE NOT caused me any sensitivity. Where other products, stating the same, have given me some issues. (Again, this is not a sponsored post and I get nothing from it. In fact I don’t even have an Amazon seller’s link anymore.) So find what’s best for you, but I would be surprised if the CeraVe products didn’t help you. I’ve tried it all… medicated products and non-medicated products.

Below I’ve suggested the best way to bathe then moisturize dry skin. It’s taken me several years to finally get this down and understand the importance of moisturizing correctly. It has then led to better healing of my skin.

So here’s a short list of what to do:

BATHING and MOISTURIZING

• After bathing, you have just minutes (really) to seal the skin or the evaporating moisture will make your skin drier.

• Pat dry, don’t rub, leaving behind some moisture so that the product will adhere to the water. CeraVe Moisturizing Cream has ceramides and hyaluronic acid, (both our own body produces) but we obviously have a skin barrier problem, so these ingredients are so important! Also, as we age, these become depleted.

• Next, immediately, apply  CeraVe Moisturizing lotion or cream, so that it will adhere to water already left on your skin.

Then, seal the skin with a more occlusive product like CeraVe Healing Ointment

• You should then dress in *loose-fitting, cotton clothing that doesn’t irritate such as cotton. Although, sometimes I have found tighter clothing to feel better in that it doesn’t move around and rub the sore areas on my body. So try different clothing.

Extra Tips:

• Sweating can aggravate eczema so avoid at all costs or quickly battle afterward.

• Itching can be so maddening that sleep is impossible, so by taking a Benadryl or Atarax (preferably at night) might help some. Although, it rarely did for me but it’s still worth a try! And/or using ice packs to aid in itching can also be helpful. It’s miserable in the winter but can provide help especially with hives.

• An H2 blocker like cimetidine, famotidine, nizatidine and ranitidine, could be tried as well. They go by various brand names in the acid reflux aisle of your store. I learned that in some cases your eczema or itching could be caused from food and this blocks histamine in the stomach.

Please let me know if any of this helps you in any way. I sure hope it does!

Also, let me know in the comments below of other things you would like me to address.

Feel free to e-mail me at: tamara42463@gmail.com.

———————-

Amazon Links to buy CeraVe products:

CeraVe Moisturizing Lotion: https://amzn.to/2HKVR1l

CeraVe Moisturizing Cream in tub: https://amzn.to/2HKVR1l
” ” in tube: https://amzn.to/2HJKHdi

CeraVe AM: https://amzn.to/2CIoZ59

CeraVe PM: https://amzn.to/2HKCdSU

CeraVe Healing Ointment: https://amzn.to/2UgpIVg &
”                                        ” 2 pack/.35 tubes (good for your purse or pocket)                        https://amzn.to/2U6R2WQ

CeraVe Hydrating Face Wash:  https://amzn.to/2U0SmdM

Sunscreens:
CeraVe Sunscreen Face Lotion with zinc: https://amzn.to/2HJZ0hR

You can also directly order of the CeraVe website: cerave.com

For more help with eczema:

https://nationaleczema.org/

Changes, and A Good Cry

The leaves and needles are falling, there’s change all over my backyard.

Nature is transitioning, and the cold is coming.

Nature mimics our lives.

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Change/transition can sometimes bring the cold too:

problems,

heartache,

and pain.

At times, ABSOLUTE TRAUMA.

Life can change out of nowhere, with not even a hint of warning…

loss of a job, a bad report from the doctor, a friend’s unfounded betrayal,

death.

And with it, brings heartache.

Deep, deep sadness.

The deepest pit.

Heartache [only YOU know] because it’s YOURS.

You own it at its deepest level.

bird fighting the snow and cold in Indiana


Yes, people can offer advice, words of comfort, even wisdom…

BUT words feel like a band-aid. You can’t really take them in.

You don’t want any more words.

You dread to see anyone. I mean how do you answer?

You feel you just can’t take anymore.

Finally, your body breaks down in a good cry. A hard cry. A shaking kind of cry.

A cry your body can’t hold in any longer.

And it pleads for a meeting with God.

A quiet, still place where He brings His presence. HIS sweet, wonderful presence.

It’s POWERFUL.

No one’s talking. It’s just still.

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That undeniable presence consumes your space.

You KNOW He’s near.

You.Can.Sense.It 

in every part of your being.

Only GOD can do that.

Only GOD really gets you.

He knows your deepest pain like no other.

Only HE can comfort.

Yes, HE knows you intimately.

He promises to get right in there and feel your sorrow with you.

He’s present…He really is.

Right alongside you.


We live in a fallen world with many hurts and disappointments.

This isn’t how we saw our lives.

This wasn’t the plan.

People weren’t supposed to be so mean.

My loved one was to be here for many, more years.

But..life happens and you’re caught off guard.

There’s no stopping it, or asking for a do-over.

You can never be prepared.

Lean on God, pour out your heart.

Feel embraced and loved today.

He gets it. He really does.

More than anyone else.

cry-poster-w

And yes, someday…

Someday…IT WILL ALL MAKE SENSE.

That is the HOPE I choose to lean on;

to cling to.

It’s my ONLY choice, really.

Taking the Fun Out of Fall for Everyone

When I first saw this, I thought…

well, if that doesn’t take all the fun out of FALL for A LOT of people!

Then, I thought…

a lot of my friends are going to be upset when they see how someone broke down their Pumpkin Spice Latte! HA

At this time, every year, I read all over facebook how people can’t wait for this season to roll around, just so they can go out and buy one,

or two, or three.

Thus, this poster jumped into my head.

spice-latte-poster

Don’t Judge…You Cannot Know the Pain Someone Is Going Through

Don’t Judge…You Cannot Know the Pain Someone Is Going Through

 

Don't judge...for you can never know another's pain.